Part Four:

Bo walked around and kneeled in front of her. He reached out and laid his hand on top of hers, where it laid on her stomach. After a few moments she looked down at him for the first time since he walked into the room. She smiled a small smile, before looking down at their hands resting on her stomach. Bo placed a finger under chin, making her look up at him, “I’m glad you’re okay. You scared me, honey.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean to frighten you,” she said, her voice void of emotion.

“It’s okay; you’re here safe and sound.” He leaned in and kissed her softly on the lips, his thumb slowly caressing the top of her hand, “So why did you leave the hospital, Red?”

“There was no reason for me to be there anymore.”

Bo shakes his head, “Not buying it, Red? If that was the only reason, you would’ve asked Larry to just release you. You wouldn’t have left on your own. So, tell me. Why did you take off like that?”

She looked away, her eyes darting around the nursery, looking every where but at Bo, “He wanted me to talk to a shrink,” she finally says. She shrugs, “I don’t do shrinks and Larry knows that. So I left on my own.”

Bo pauses for a moment, knowing he was about to trod on very thin ice, “Maybe Larry’s right, Red. Maybe you should talk to someone, maybe we both should.”

Ignoring him, acting as though he hadn’t said a word, she looks down at him, “You know what, I’m tired. I think I’m going to bed.”

Bo just nods and lets out a sad sigh,” Okay, let me help you,” he says knowing their conversation was now over.

He helps her up out of the rocking chair, holding her close as they walk down the hallway. Her head instinctively falls onto his shoulder as they make their way to their bedroom. He helped her undress, helping her adjust the pillows and blankets in order to find a comfortable position. He crawled into bed beside her, lifting himself up onto his elbow.

She slowly turned her head to look at him, for a moment giving into the emotions that were lying right on the surface, as a few tears fell. He leaned over, kissing the tears from her cheeks, “I know, honey. I know.”

She nods, reaching out to lay her hand on his cheek, “I do love you; you know that right? No matter what happens, I need you to remember that.”

“Nothings going to happen, Red, we’re going to make it through this. Together.”

She looks deep into his eyes, seeing her own pain mirrored in his, knowing she was at fault. Together, she thought. No, if it hadn’t been for her there would be nothing for them to get through, other than two a.m. feeding and sleepless nights. She just needed him to know that her love for him would never change.

He pulled her close, running his hand up and down her arm, lulling her to sleep. Soon her eyes drifted closed, the emotions of the day finally taking their toll. Bo waited until he heard her breathing become steady and carefully and quietly climbed out of bed. He picked up the cordless phone off the table and walked out into the hallway. He closed the door and made his phone call, “Larry…yeah I found her…She came home. I found her in the nursery…No, I don’t think she’ll come back to the hospital…I tried bringing it up. She won’t budge, she doesn’t want to talk to anyone…I’ve already thought of that, and I agree. I’ll call Susannah…Okay, Larry; we’ll see you tomorrow when you stop by.”

Bo opened the door back up and looked in on her, before heading downstairs. He walked over to the desk and opened the drawer, pulling out her address book. He flipped through the pages, running his finger down the entries until he found the one he was looking for. He dialed, waiting patiently for her to answer, “Susannah, its Bo.” Bo walked over and sat down on the couch and filled Susannah in on all that had transpired. She promised she would handle telling Selma and Len, Bo said he would take care of calling Rachel. Susannah also promised to be on the first flight available once Bo felt the time was right for her to come. Bo thanked her and hung up, throwing the phone down on the couch, laying his head against the back of the couch.

Larry came and checked on Nora the day after she signed herself out of the hospital. Nora was still refusing to talk to anyone. She got extremely agitated when they suggested she speak with Susannah. Nora yelled at Larry, pretty much kicking him and Bo out of the bedroom. She fell into a fitful sleep, as Larry and Bo talked in the living room.

“I’m sorry, Larry.” Bo says as he walks him to the door.

“Its okay, Bo, honestly, I understand completely. It’s only been a few days since you lost Sarah.”

Bo nods and shakes Larry’s hand, telling him that he would let him know if Nora ever changes her mind about talking to someone. He closed the door and walked back into the living room. He lay down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling with his arm draped across his forehead.

The next few days passed quickly and quietly; the silence between them was deafening. This silence between them was killing him and knowing the pain that was in her eyes, that the emptiness she was feeling was his fault, made it worse. He closed his eyes and quickly drifted off into a fitful sleep.

An hour later he awoke and walked back upstairs to check on her. He walked over and picked up the pad of paper off her small dressing table, and jotted down a quick note. He walked over and placed the note on his pillow. He walked around the other side of the bed and kissed her softly on the lips before unplugging the telephone and making his way back downstairs. He unplugged the other phone and picked up his keys off the desk. He walked over to his bike, pulling the helmet over his head. He slid onto his bike slowly backing it out of the drive. He started it up at the end of the driveway and took off on a long ride to clear his head.

A half hour after Bo left Nora begins to stir. She turns her head and sees the note lying on his pillow. She picks it up and reads it to herself, “Red, I’m going for a ride and then I’m going to check on things at the station. I’ve unplugged the phones so that you can rest in peace. Call me if you need me and I’ll be there. Love you, Bo.”

She lays the note back onto his pillow, and throws the blankets back. She slowly and carefully climbed out of bed, the discomfort from the surgery, causing her to sit back down. She takes a few deep breaths and lays her hand on the nightstand, this time using it to place her weight on. She runs her hands along the wall as she makes her way to the door.

She braces herself against the wall as she slowly makes it down the stairs, her walking cast making it a cumbersome task. A few minutes later she was downstairs, using various pieces of furniture and the walls as leverage once again. She walked over to the mini bar in the corner of the living room. She pulled out the bottle of wine from its cradle and set it down on the top of the table. She stared at the bottle and glass for a few minutes before finally pouring a glass. She took a few sips, before finishing the rest off all at once. She picked the bottle and the glass up and slowly walked over to the chair and sat down, pouring herself another.

Two drinks become four and four quickly becomes half the bottle. She was hiding, once again, hiding her pain in alcohol.

Minutes turned to hours and the afternoon quickly faded to late evening before Bo arrived home. He had spent the past hours locked in his office looking over the accident reports, witness statements, and forensic evidence. With each new document the rage within him became stronger and stronger; his determination to find the driver that caused them to lose their daughter became fierce.

He found her lying on the couch, an empty box of tissues lying on the floor, no trace of the wine or glass to be found. He walks over and sits on the ottoman, watching her as she slept. He reached out and brushed a strand of hair off her forehead. His arms ached to hold her, to bring her back from the place that she was putting herself. He knows that place well and she’d pulled him from that same darkness, why wouldn’t she let him do the same for her.

TBC…