.

After a few hugs and kisses Matthew was on his way home with Stevie and his mother, both of the young boys talking about their summers and what adventures they had been on. Nora and Bo drove the twenty minutes to Llanview Hospital in silence. She wanted to tell him about Daniel, how she had broken things off with him, but she could see the worry on his face. She could see the lines in his face and after all these years she knew what each line meant.

They pull into the parking lot and quickly find a spot. Bo turns off the car and unfastens his belt. Just as he was about to reach for the door handle he felt the warmth of her hand on his knee. He looks over at her and she can see the tears welling up in his eyes. He smiles a tentative smile and nods, letting her know he appreciates the support she’s offering him.

Suddenly her cell phone rings, breaking the silence that still fill the car. She pulls it out of her purse and looks down at the caller id. She looks up at Bo and then back down at the phone, dropping it back into her purse. He looks at her, “You should answer that,” pausing as he opens the door, “It might be Daniel,” he says over his shoulder as he climbs out of the car.

Nora sighs and quickly opens the door. She quickens her pace to try and step in line with his. She finally catches up with him as he was stepping through the automatic doors. She wanted to tell him that he was wrong, that even though he was right, that it was Daniel on the phone, she had no desire to talk to him outside the realm of their professional lives. These exact words were just about to come from her mouth when an announcement over the loudspeaker stopped them dead in their tracks, “Dr. Wolek to Rm. 115 stat. Dr. Wolek to Rm. 115 stat.”

Bo turns to Nora, “That’s Pa’s room.”

He rushes down the hallway and she follows closely behind him. They turn the corner and see Larry trying to calm a frantic Renee down. Bo rushes over to them. Larry looks up at Bo, “Bo, please, look after Renee, I have to get back in there.”

Larry turns to leave. Bo takes Renee’s hand, “Renee, what happened? I thought you said Pa was stable.” Bo turns and looks into the room and at the activity surrounding his father. He looks back at Renee, “Tell me what happened.”

“I…I was just sitting there. Your Pa had fallen asleep.” She walks over and looks through the window. She lays her hand on the glass and continues, “The room was so quiet and then all of a sudden the alarms started going off.” She turns and looks at Bo again, “He looks so pale and so weak, Bo,” she says through her tears.

Bo lays his hands on her shoulders, “He’s survived worse, Renee. He’ll come back to us. He has too much to live for. He has you, you guys just got remarried,” he looks over her shoulder at Nora, who has tears in her eyes, “He has so many more memories to make with Matthew. They’ve already missed so much,” he adds quietly.

Nora walks over and stands next to Bo, “Bo’s right, Renee. Asa won’t leave us.”

Just then Larry walks back out of the room, “How is he?” Renee asks.

“He’s stable…for now.”

“What does that mean, doc…for now?” Bo asks.

“Asa had a very serious concussion, but the three days he spent in that ravine without food, water and most importantly his medication, has weakened his heart. He’s caught an extremely serious bacterial infection and it’s traveled into his blood stream.”

“So what do we have to do?”

“We’ve given him high dosages of antibiotics, but beyond that all we can do is wait,” Larry looks at each of them, “and pray.”

“Can we see him?”

Larry shakes his head, “I’m sorry, Renee. Not until the fever and the infection breaks. He’s being moved to the ICU.”

Renee nods, “Thank you, Larry.” Larry nods and walks back into the room. She turns and looks at Bo and Nora, “I’m…I’m going to go up to the ICU waiting area. I want to be here when Asa wakes up.”

Bo and Nora each hug Renee and watch her walk away. They stand together in an awkward silence. Bo looks down at the cell phone she’s still holding in her hand, “I’m going to go check in with the station. I’m sure you want to check in with Daniel.”

Once again before she can say anything he walks down the hallway towards the chapel. Nora sighs and dials her phone, “Hey there sweetie. You having fun at Stevie’s?...That’s good…Yeah, I’m here with your dad…Yeah sweetie they found your granpa…No, no champ you can’t see him right now…Well I’m sure your granpa can’t wait to hear all about Chicago, but it’s going to have to wait until he’s feeling better. Listen, why don’t you finish playing with Stevie and I’ll bring pizza home. It’s been a long time since we’ve had some Sal’s…” Nora closes her eyes and sighs deeply, “Okay, buddy, I’ll ask your dad if he wants to join us but he might have to work.”

Bo watches her from down the hallway. She has her back to him. He sighs and opens the door to the chapel. He walks into the candlelit room and sits down in the front pew. He leans his head back and sighs. He closes his eyes, a tear escaping from the corner of one of them, “Dear God, please be with my father. We both know that he’s no saint and some may say he’s getting what he deserves, but I don’t buy that…no one deserves this.”

She quietly opens the door and sees him sitting there. She walks towards him but stops when he begins to speak again, “Pa and Renee just found their way back to each other; please don’t take him away from her now. If you don’t do this for me, do this for her. I know what it’s like to lose the one person who makes you feel complete. I threw that all away a long time ago and in the process hurt the only person who ever truly loved me for me,” he pauses for a moment, “and I hurt our son terribly.” Nora leans against the wall, a hand to her mouth to stifle the sob that threatened to break free. Nora turns and walks out the door before Bo begins to speak again.

Bo pulls out his wallet and takes out the picture of him and Matthew that Nora took during their indoor camping trip. Bo runs his finger over Matthew’s face. “God,” he says with a sigh, “Please, please if you let Pa survive this I’ll do every thing I have to to put things right, to heal my family.”

Outside in the hall, Nora is leaning against the wall, the tears running unchecked down her face. She didn’t know whether the tears were coming form her fear for Asa or from the emotions and pain that comes from hearing Bo talk about the past.

Inside the chapel Bo stands up and lights a candle before he walks towards the door. Out in the hallway Nora hears the handle click on the chapel doors. She quickly turns her back and wipes the tears off her face. She turns around and looks at him. She adjusts her purse on her shoulders and points over her shoulder, “I just saw them take your father upstairs. Do you want to see go up before we leave?”

Bo sighs and shakes his head, “No, I’ll come back later tonight if Renee needs me too. She needs her time alone with him, even if they can’t be in the same room right now.”

Nora nods and forces a smile, “Well I called Matthew while you were checking in with the station. I told him I’d pick up some pizza on the way home.” She pauses for a moment and takes a deep breath before continuing, “I told him I’d ask you if you’d care to join us for dinner. I told him you’d probably have to…”

 

“I’d love to,” he says, cutting her off.

Nora smiles a small smile and drops her cell phone into her purse. She motions towards the door, “Alright then, let’s go get our son.”

They spent the twenty minute ride back to her house in silence. They listened to song after song on the CD he had in his car, him staring at the road straight ahead and her staring out the window. She would occasionally glance over at him, noticing how his hands were tightly wrapped around the steering wheel, wrapped so tight his knuckles were turning white. He would also glance over at her, noticing how she folded and unfolded her hands, twisting the ring on her finger. He could see her mind at work, from the way her eyes were darting around to the way her lips were moving as she silently debated with herself over something.

They both turned at the same time and began to speak. He smiled, “You go first.”

“I was just going to say that Matthew is going to be happy that you’re going to stay for dinner. He’s a bit confused about why he can’t see his granpa, it’ll be good to have something to take his mind off of Asa for a while.”

“It’ll be good for me too.” He glances over at her, “I really miss him when he’s not around.”

Nora smiled a small smile, “He misses you too.” She says quietly.

They pull into her driveway a few minutes later, neither one saying another word; the tension in the car was so thick it was almost visible. Bo climbs out of the car and points over his shoulder at Stevie’s house across the street, “Do you mind if I go get him?”

Nora smiles and nods her head, “No go ahead.”

Bo returns her smile and leaves. Nora steps up onto the front porch and turns and looks back across the street. She sighs and leans against the pillar when she sees Matthew jump into his father’s arms, wrapping his arms around his neck. A single tear escapes as she watches Bo carry him across the street, Matthew’s arms waving in excitement while his dad holds him tight. “This isn’t right,” she thinks to herself. “Somehow I’ve got to make it right.”

She turns and walks inside just as Bo and Matthew reach the middle of the driveway. Matthew suddenly stops and looks intently at Bo, “You look tired, dad. Are you okay?”

Bo smiles, “Of course I’m okay, champ. Your old dad’s just been spending a lot of time working on finding your granpa.”

“Mom said granpa’s sick.”

“Yeah, yeah he is, buddy, but the doctors are taking really good care of him and he’s going to be up and around before you know, just in time to go horseback riding with you like he promised.”

Matthew wraps his arms around Bo’s neck again, “I’m just glad you’re here dad.”

Bo kisses his forehead, “I’m glad I’m here too, son.”

They spend the rest of the evening eating pizza and watching DVD after DVD until Matthew falls asleep on the couch, his head resting against his father’s shoulder. Bo slides off the couch, letting Matthew’s head rest against the pillow. He leans down and picks him up, Matthew’s head instinctively going to rest on his father’s shoulder. Nora smiles up at Bo as he carries their son to bed.

When Bo returns to the living room ten minutes later Nora is talking on the phone. Bo walks over and picks up his jacket, “Matthew’s upstairs waiting.” He says as he walks towards the door. Nora hangs up the phone harder than she meant to.

Bo turns. She looks at him, “Where are you going?”

“Home; you didn’t need to end your call on my behalf, Nora. I’m sure you and Daniel have a lot of catching up to do.”

Bo turns to leave again, “I broke it off with him,” she says quietly.

Bo stops, his foot perched over the top step of the landing. He pauses for a moment before turning around, “You did what?”

“I broke things off with him, and if you hadn’t been such an ass all day every time my phone rang I would’ve been able to tell you.”

“An ass?”

She places her hands on her hips, “Yes an ass! You’ve been acting almost as childish as Matthew was today at the diner. I know you hate Coulson. I know you don’t think he was the right man for me, and you know what you were right, okay? You were right, he’s not the right man for me, but I don’t need you sulking around like an eight year old.”

“So first I was an ass and now I’m an eight year old?” He drapes his jacket over his arm, “You know what I don’t need this.”

He turns to leave. She walks over and grabs his arm, “Don’t walk out on me, Bo. Don’t you dare walk out now!”

He turns around, “What do you want, Nora, huh? What do you want me to say, that every time I saw you with Daniel I thought I had been punched in the gut? That every time he laid a hand on you it took everything in me not to deck him? Is that what you want?!”

“If it’s the truth, then yes, that’s what I want!”

Bo shakes his head, “I can’t do this right now, Nora. I don’t want to have this discussion here, with our son just a few feet away. I need some time to think,” he puts his jacket on; “I’ve got to go somewhere to think.”

She stands there and watches him walk out the door. She picks up a book and throws it across the room, before picking up the phone, “MaryAnn, it’s Nora, I’m sorry to call you so late but can you come over and watch Matthew for me. I…there’s something I have to take care of.”

Thirty minutes later she is sitting behind the wheel of her car, “Commissioner Buchanan, please,” she says into her phone, “okay, thank you,” she says moments later. “Damnit Bo where are you?” She throws her phone down on the seat beside her and suddenly it hits her. She remembers the family lodge that Matthew told her about, where Bo had taken him fishing. She knew it was a place that she was supposed to remember but she didn’t. She picks her phone back up and dials Jessica. Five minutes later she had her car turned around and she was on her way up Llantano Mountain.

Bo parks his car in front of the lodge and turns the engine off. He sits behind the wheel for a few minutes, listening to the sounds of the night coming in through his opened window. He opens the door with a sigh and walks up to the front door, quickly turning his key in the lock. He walks over and turns on the light, walking further into the room with a sigh. He puts a few logs on the fire, the early October air holding a chill up here on the mountain.

A few minutes later he walks over to the wet bar and pours himself a drink. He swirls the liquid around in the glass before finishing it in one gulp, quickly pouring himself another. He walks over to the large bookshelf on the far wall and looks at each picture, generations and generations of Buchanan’s staring back at him. He looks at the last few pictures, picking them up and holding them in front of him. One was of him and Drew at his police academy graduation, and the other was of him and Matthew on their last fishing trip before Nora had taken him to Chicago.

He stares at the pictures of his sons, so many could have and should have beens rising to the surface. He remembers the promises he uttered just hours before in the hospital chapel. Why did he walk out on her tonight? What was he so afraid of?

She pulls up the long driveway and sees his car sitting there. She looks out the window at the large house in front of her. Her heart begins to race and she was finding it hard to breathe. She was suddenly hit with a feeling of dread, a feeling that was ripping through her like a knife. Something happened here, she thinks to herself, something awful. She leans her head back against the headrest and closes her eyes. She brings her hand up to her chest, resting it over her beating heart. She takes a few deep breathes trying desperately to calm her stomach, fighting back the feelings of nausea that threatened to over take her.

She sits up, opening her eyes. She looks through the large window and sees him standing in the middle of the room, a glass of something in his one hand and an unrecognizable object in the other. She turns off the engine and opens the door with a heavy sigh. She came here tonight for some answers, to see once and for all if there was something left between them, if they could move past the pain and make a family with their son. She turns off the engine and leans her head back. One thing she knew for sure was that the only way they could figure out the future was to let go of the past, and this place just might be the place to do that.

He turns when he hears the door open. He stares at her from across the room. She steps off the landing and walks over to the poker table, dropping her purse onto the table. He looks down at the pictures once more and then turns and places them back on the shelf. He picks up his glass and stands across from her, “How did you know to look for me here. I didn’t think you remembered this place.”

She looks around the masculine room, taking a few deep breaths, trying to push away the feelings that kept trying to break through the fog of her lost memories, “Matthew told me about it, that you liked to come up here and think,” she shrugs, “I took a chance.”

He places his glass back down on the table after finishing it, “Why…”

“Why did I come after you?” He nods, “Because I want the truth. You owe me the truth, Bo.” She walks around and stands beside him, “I told you that I broke things off with Daniel, that I’ve been trying to tell you all day, but the minute I call you on the way you’ve been acting around me, and around Daniel and I, you leave, you walk out. I may not remember much about what happened leading to the end of our marriage, but tonight I realized one thing, I remembered the way it must’ve felt when you walked out on us. I want some answers Bo. I want the truth.”

Bo runs his hands over his face in frustration, and walks over to the large window, before turning back around and looking at her, “The truth, okay, here’s the truth. Yeah, I can’t stand the man. I can’t stand the way he is around the office. I can’t stand the way he talks to you when I’m around, like he’s rubbing it in my face. And I can’t stand when he’s around Matthew. So, you know what, maybe that makes me an ass, and maybe that makes me childish, but it’s the way I feel. It’s the truth.” He walks over and stands in front of her, “Now it’s your turn Nora, I want the truth. What’s the real reason you went to Chicago?”….

TBC….